I am a big fan of New Year’s Resolutions. I try to make a few every year, and encourage others to do so as well. I try not to promote the typical “lose 10 pounds” or “be nicer to the annoying, creepy guy at work” resolutions –although those two things are always in the back of my mind. Nope, I try to think of ‘different’ things to put on the list:
One year, it was my goal to take better care of my car. Two accidents and boo-koo bucks later, I did not necessarily achieve the goal set out.
Another year, right after college, I decided to give the people at my credit union a break from me calling them to check my balance every day and tried my darned-est to keep that pesky checkbook balanced at all times. Let’s just say, I really regretted falling asleep during Personal Money Management 101! (What can I say? It was right after breakfast and I was SLEEPY!)
Oh, and I tried to give up cussing one year. I’m still wondering what the hell I was thinking THAT year. I didn’t last 20 minutes! (They shouldn’t make you start your NY Reso’s until AFTER the Husker Bowl game!)
…So, I’ve had a few failures, but I’ve also had a few triumphs, and that is why I still make them, without fail, every year.
In an effort to hold myself accountable, I’m posting 2009’s Resolutions on here, and underneath are suggestions on how to bring them to fruition. ‘Cuz we all know I need to have “A Plan.”
Here goes nothing…
1. Stop the squirrels from crapping on the patio and patio furniture.
a. Buy a BB gun and a scary mask.
2. Stay awake during Father “Really-Old-Guy’s” Homilies on Sundays.
a. Buy some No-Doze.
b. Start shouting “AMEN!” at random times throughout the service.
3. Make room in the budget for DVR so you don’t have to hear “It will CHANGE YOUR LIFE” one more time.
a. Create a budget. (Hmmm...)
b. Stop spending money on booze. (hahahahaha, that's funny.)
c. Give up dying your hair (Seriously, where do I come up with these ridiculous thoughts?)
d. Become friends with a Cable Guy (ding!ding!ding!)
4. Develop better comebacks when people ask you why you’re still single.
a. “My therapist says it’s because I don’t like men that talk or have an opinion. He’s an idiot.”
b. “I’m not single, I just choose not to talk about Larry, Jeff, Steve & Harold. I get confused.”
c. “I’m trying to be the next Carrie Bradshaw, minus the big city, nice clothes, and endless opportunities to meet hot, available men.”
d.“Cats are better companions.” (Sick)
5. Run/Compete in a few 5k’s or ½ Marathons
a. Run Forrest, RUN!
b. Buy oxygen tank & Heel-y’s
6. Pay off my Target Visa (Retail therapy after break-ups can be expensive and dangerous… I don’t recommend it unless you actually have cash.)
a. Ask ex-boyfriend to pay it off….it’s his fault (again, the crazy thoughts! I need meds.)
b. Sling some more bling.
c. Garage Sale (hopefully it will be more successful than the last one. Work on Marketing strategy.)
7. Make the house homey-er….and not in the O.G. sort of way.
a. Commit to colors & paint the bedrooms (You can do it!)
b. Cut down the scary bush in front of the house
c. Find a lawn boy
d. Pump up the kiddie pool and have a pool party! Woo-hoo!
8. Keep the blog updated, for your own sanity and enjoyment of others!
a. One per week, even if it’s crap.
Looks like I’ve got a decent list started, but first things first: I’ve got one more day or so to get my 2008 Reso’s accomplished…..
Where’s that creepy, annoying co-worker of mine? I should probably tell him that he did a good job on the TPS reports and that Friday is Hawaiian Shirt Day….
Happy New Year!